Aliens > Earth > America > Video

Okay now, seriously.
I'm pretty certain, even though it happens, that you're not allowed, nor supposed, to lie in the newspapers.
Or well, actually, I wouldn't call it lies. But it sure as hell isn't the truth.. Or well it is the truth, but it's still fucked up... Or is it fucked up? But it's not the truth, it's not lies, can't say it's a lie when it's just as close to the truth as it's not.
It all got messed up.
What I'm talking about is horoscopes, or as I prefer to call them: Whorescopes.
Either way.
Anyone, ANYONE in the world with some common sense would first of all figure out that they're not telling the truth. They are not telling you your destiny. Even if they're not actually lying.
They are simply just describing simple facts and everyday situations that occur to you every single day.
You read them, and you go "Yeah... That did happen..." or "Yes, that might happen".
The thing is that yes, it can happen. It will happen, unless it already did.
Because every fucking day, every single one of them. They just go "Today something positive will happen in your sorroundings and you will get a positive reaction from it. But beware, things may change quicker than you think."
.....
NO SHIT?!
That, ladies, gentlemen and everything inbetween, is what happens every day to everyone. Good things happen, bad things happen.
And frankly it pisses me off because:
A. They post that shit in newspapers.
B. People fucking believe in it.

But it also doesn't surprise me.
People belive all sort of things.
I mean... Literally anything.
Just look at, for an example which I've more than likely brought up before, America and Aliens.
Well yes, of course fucking of course.
Aliens do indeed exist. There's no possibillity that they wouldn't exist since the universe is infinite, therefore infinite amount of possibillites, infinite amount of planets, etc etc.
So yes, aliens do exist. But that's not the weird thing.
The weird thing is that each time we see aliens visiting our planet, they ALWAYS decide to visit... Guess what country?
AMERICA!
Yes, because... That's just logical.
Out of all those millions of "alien ships" that have "visited" earth, 99% of them have gone straight to our beloved America.
Because of several reasons I would imagine.
I mean, come on.
First of all: if you go there and you don't fit in. They will fucking gun you down, and what better reason do you need?
Second: The president of the United States of the fucking America is indeed positioned there. So we had better be going there so we could indeed have a very serious talk with him. Because we can either speak english or they can build a device to understand us. Yes. Yes....

And the odd thing is, with all their technology.... The aliens, not America.... They decide to travel to earth, for reasons known to no one whatsoever, and try to be "stealthy". But each time, EACH TIME, they try to do so, they manage to fail. Because no matter wherever the fuck they go, there will always be some stupid fucking American camping the sky with a god damn video camera, JUST IN CASE, an alien battlecruiser just pops by to see how everyone is doing on earth.
Then after they have been miraciously caught on a video, the guy/girl, most likely a fucked up guy, decide to upload it on youtube or some other fucking site and people will belive it, not believe it, call it fake, argue against the argument of it being fake and such. And the aliens are just FIIIIIIIIIIINE with this. Because they just got caught on tape while trying to stealth around on our planet.
Not that even if this would actually happen for real, they wouldn't even have to worry.
The only ones who would believe the stupid American, camping the wilderness with his crappy camera, would be other stupid fucks (not necessarily another American this time).

Now, don't get me wrong...
Not ALL Americans are stupid, hell no.
But you know, a quite huge amount of the population seem to be stupid in one way or another.

PS.
It somewhat smells like catfood where I'm sitting for no apparent reason.